"I'll Never..."

I believe the direct quote was "I'll never be caught dead driving a minivan!"

And I believe I uttered this same bold statement at least 50 times throughout my lifetime, most emphatically whenever Paul suggested how great a van would be to own. Funny what the reality of 3 kids under 5 does to a person's vanity regarding "mom mobiles".

It's amazing how many times I have said the phrase "I'll never..." when it comes to parenting. Even worse is how many times I've judged mothers, thinking in my oh-so-smug little head that I'd never stoop to her level, nor be so ridiculous as to give into such spoiled kids. And then you become a parent and you eat all those "I'll never's".

Here's just a few of my own personal favorites:

"I'll never nurse a child once he/she is old enough to ask for it."

"I'll never give into my kid's tantrums. I'll just leave the store and that'll teach 'em."

(And have to come back to do my errand again? Yeah, right!)

"I'll never walk/rock/nurse/bounce a child to sleep for hours on end. That's just crazy."

"I'll never be one of those obsessive moms that has a video monitor and spies on their baby."

"I'll never bribe my kids with lollipops or candy."

I know I cannot be the only one eating my words since I became a parent and gained an insider's perspective (and fell in love with my sweet baby girls).

What "I never's..." have you uttered that now seem absolutely absurd or just plain futile?

Primate of the Year

On a recent outing to the SB Zoo, we were treated to some very unique primate behaviors and learned much about this intelligent species and it's similarity to other primate species.

For example, as an older primate grabbed it's sibling for a photo opportunity (as requested by it's mother), the younger primate heavily resisted and soon after this photo, was observed attempting to bite the older primate as a means of escape. Intervention was necessary, therefore no photographic evidence exists of this exhange, but the older primate remained wary of the younger one for the next few hours.

In this next example, three members of a primate family exhibit their egotistical tendencies by repeatedly taking photographs of themselves with a camera. The mother primate seemed especially absorbed in working with the camera, while the youngest seemed very disinterested in such behavior and soon began howling in protest, much to the chagrin of nearby train riders. Further research into primate vanity and photographic behavior is necessary.

As a last example, our young primate poses with another similar primate, the gorilla. Neither primate seems exceptionally interested in the other, however it was noted that the mother of the young primate was considering adding her primate to the zoo collection. Threats by mother primate continued as young primate's behavior declined throughout the morning. Highly intriguing and bears further study.